did my jury, did my thang
December 10, 2003 at 10:21 a.m.
rurf. allllgnah. zzzzzzooooooooop. hornk.
All the noises my insides are making riiight now. I don't know what it is but something about juries and recitals beings out my inner insecure freak.
Interesting facts about my jury
* I just played it.
* The profs were scarier than usual.
* I look riduculously hott.
* It was the first time I'd ever performed the Grieg III mvt, so for the first time I was great - for a jury though.... urg, we'll see...
* My arms are fine but my back is on FIRE - owwie!
* A strand of hair got stuck to my lip gloss for a second there and obsured my view of the music... that's got to be hott.
* It's over!!!
Now... I need some Urmi, or some Danielle. I need to disappear inside the covers of one of my friend's beds and eat bad food and let my hair down and throw my shoes across the room... giggle about boys and rejoin the living agian.
What is it about juries and recitals that bring out the crackhead in all music majors. For no reason, my brain tried to kill me last night. I'd had a great day, feeling happy and warm, and then it became countdown to jury time and I started getting scared about things that I know in my heart I shouldn't.
My heart is calm. Why is my brain so off?
WHERE IS MY CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM AND DANI OR URMI OR MAT OR MATT OR SEAN OR MARCY?? After juries used to be the best time of the year... well, I get lunch with a really hott boy in an hour, that's a treat:)
But now I'm off to make dozens of business calls, calculate tuition and get some parents off my back and then teach until late tonight.
I misss being an undergrad. This grown-up thing is less rosy.
Sunday before last I went over to my friend Kely's house and comandeered him to make me dinner. He's my home teacher (LDS thing) and I figured it was his duty to feed me since I'd just moved and I has food-less.
I think I was having a tough day, I don't remember why, but I was feeling iggy and scared and I was rolling all over the floor at his parents house with the softest carpet eeeverrrr wigging about something.
Kely came in and in his quiet voice he said "Reva, I think you feel so strong about this because you are a musician and you guys have to constantly dig deep inside yourselves to make what you do better... maybe you dug too deep."
heehee - I'm a freaking dwarf.
SUPERCRACK is off to the races!