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new teacher and life

August 02, 2004 at 9:47 p.m.

So, this is my official first week at the school, trying to get things ready. I'm seriously overwhelmed but my co-teacher is so supportive... I'm still just massively, massively freaked out.

Few things occured to cheer my spirits though.... number one being ScandalousCandalous sending me a picture of Paige and Mrs. Helga's fishie - the fishie that is named.... ME!!!!

here's what Paigie wrote me when she told em about my new namesake:

"We got a BEAUTIFUL beta fish today, and, in your honor, we are naming it Reva. Even though it's a boy... couldn't name him Larry, couldn't name him Melvin (the name of the cousin with the ponytail that my mom doesn't like). He's beautiful-- just like you! The purple/pink/blue shiny fishy from the tip of the fin to the bottom of the gils."

I'm a violent, possesive, GORGEOUS man-fish!!!!

Why does that work on a few levels?? hmmmm.... merci you guys!!! Loved the pic and I looooove you!!

*&^%*&%$^$@#^#!^#$&^#^$*&^%$*&$*$*&^$*&^$*&^

So I was puttering around school today and I feel pretty helpless. I'm confused, and I keep getting lost. And the football coaches scare me. They're just like the football players when I was in high school, but they've grown up into coaches and I've grown up in the an orchestra teacher. It seems so odd, but they still scare me.

I had lunch with the choir teacher and my co-teach and 3 choir students. I had so much in common with them, i just wanted to gab with them, but I'm still learning the things a gal can't say as a teacher (not like I'm crazy wtih the dirty jokes all the time or anything, but still), and they didn't call me by my first name. They called me Miss K#@$%^$#!!! I don't feel comfy being called that... I was Miss Reva as a violin teacher, but here in the proper south, I'm an official adult.

EEEPPP!!!!!!

Someone stole my freaking identity! How did I end up here?!

I'm now in search of purple paint so I can paint cow spots all over my room. I ought to learn how to conduct, but at the moment, the spots seem sooooo important. Plus, at least I can figure that out. The stuff I was hired to do? No flippin' clue.

But all's well that is well.... weird thing to say...

^&$&^%#$&^#^&%#$@^%#^%$&^%#&^#&^%$&^$&

Joel freaking came to my school today, couldn't find me but found my car and left a note on it...! How awesome is that?!? Who doesn't love the car notes?!?!

Danielle is coming to visit me this weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY FREAKING JOY JOY!!!

Ben from MI is coming to visit me in 2 weeks, and I can't freaking wait. Fun people need ot just move here and keep me company alll the time. The nice new boy is doing a good job, except I freak out every few hours and it's taking some effort to breathe. man, I am so weird. But he's just so darn nice.

(how many times have y'all heard me say that before?????? so don't worry, I'm being very, very, very, very, very cautious and am takin' my sweet time.)

I just found out that 2 of my most recent exes did massively dumb things that got back to me way too easily. I'm so glad to live outside the creepy loop that was my Mesa dating scene, and to be away from them!!

&^$&^%#&^#^%&^$#&^%#$@^$#@%$#%#&^%#^%#

and finally, if you are so bored that you are still reading, a list. A DEEP one:)

I AM: an exrovert in every sense of the word.

I WANT: to be happy.

I HAVE: the best friends a girl could ask for.

I WISH: I didn't get so lonely.

I HATE: judgemental people, and meanies that use me.

I MISS: O'Boisies. Remember those chips? They were INCREDIBLE! And also, my friends.

I FEAR: people discovering all my flaws.

I HEAR: my mother's words, guiding me and supporting me. Bobby McFerrin's "Walkman" in my head when I'm happy, George Harrison's "Here Comes the Sun" when I'm not.

I SEARCH: for goodness in people and dark chocolate in all forms.

I WONDER: how the heck I got in this place in my life, and where the heck I'll be in a year.

I REGRET: not going to my undergrad graduation ceremony, and not buying that black skirt. It's funny, I actually bought the red one and I love it, but that black one would sooo come in handy, you know?? So freaking perfect... why oh why ??

I LOVE: smiling. And making music.

I ALWAYS: get afraid before I speak to large groups of people.

I AM NOT: a sum of all my mistakes.

I DANCE: A LOT. With some of the best people I know. Dancing brings happiness and light into me, and man, if my MatMunch and Hiro aren't the dandiest partners ever:)

I SING: my own words. I hope people will hear them someday.

I CRY: at the oddest times, and often (my kindergarten teachers thought I was crazy, but it's just something I do). To release. Waterproof mascara is a must.

I AM NOT ALWAYS: sure of myself, or on time.

I WRITE: for therapy.

I WIN: when no one loses.

I LOSE: when competition is involved.

I CONFUSE: most people.

I NEED: people.

I SHOULD: get more sleep and stop worrying.

SUPERCRACK IS: going to bed:)

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wife. mother. musician. bloggerist for 7 years. holding on for dear life.

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