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almost a month away.....

December 13, 2004 at 4:14 p.m.

ARG! I haven't written in about a jazillion years, glaaah. I have bunches and bunches of holiday concerts and running around and no time to breathe or be or relax and right now I'm just so tired I can hardly stand it.

But, some people think I'm making a difference around here, I think.

In just over a month, I'm going to be married. MARRIED.

I'm not freaking out as much as I ought.. am I going to turn into some quiet mormon housewife? I'm really worried about that. The point of this like to to change - to grow - what's the point of staying stagnant? If I was perfect in this moment, I wouldn't need any more moments, you know? but am I going to turn into someone I've never been able to relate to, and someone who doesn't relate to others anymore?

That's all that worries me. That and the dolphins.

I'm going to be married a month from Wednesday.

WHY??

Because I love Jared. I want to grow with him and learn with him. I really believe that's why we have this whole marriage thing.

And for all I've dreamed of having someone in my life, I never really believed I'd be married.

Now, I'm going to have a husband. Be a wife. Be ridiculously poor for a while. NOT have children for a while. Eventually, I will get that maternal instinct. But not yet. Jared and I need to grow with each other more before we have anyone else in our relationship.

OH MY HECK, yeah I am freaking out a little. Good thing I'm crazy about him.

So I ahve one month until I'm going to be married. WHAT SHOULD I DO??? What knids of things should you do one month before you do that? I've done so much fun wonderful stuff in my life, I'm so lucky.... but what do I need to get done?? Any thoughts??

But yeah, I'm still alive. Whodathunk that was possible?!?

SUPERCRACK is marching.. marching...


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wife. mother. musician. bloggerist for 7 years. holding on for dear life.

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