No Husband Report
June 12, 2006 at 10:12 p.m.
No husband in the house/country/hemisphere Day one: Thank heavens for mom being in town. She's only here until Wednesday (and then I'm gone for a few days too) but I'm keeping it together because she's here. I'm not co-dependent, but I am a very social creature. I need people to talk to and communicate with and with Jared being out of work for a few months, we spent an increeedible amount of time together. I mean, dear fans, didn't you notice I had stopped updating as much? I was busy having husband around alll the time and I daresay, I loved it.
Now? Cold turkey. Bah, I miss husband :(
Oh, and did I mention I'm afraid of the dark? My house is big and makes noises. I keep thinking I hear Jared but he's not here. I get scared really, really easily. This is going to be a really scary month.
So mom brought this chart by that goes through the sages of trauma/stress as brought on by the 4 most commonly traumatic experiences in life - moving, changing a job/career, birth, and death. We have 3 out of 4 goung on at this very moment. Holy crap, sometimes it hits me - I means REALLY hits me that life is going to get intensely stressful and I'm embarking on the most harebrained experience EVER.
My husband is in Brazil, and I'm moving there in just over a month. I'm 6 months pregnant. Jared is taking over a new job with much more responsibility (and possibly putting him in charge over the entire plant in brazil in a few months) and I could very well be seeing him less as I'm about to be giving birth and caring for an infant in a country where I don't speak the language, know a soul and apparently should not be allowed to drive in either because it's unsafe.
I guess when you look at it that way, you think I'm nuts for agreeing to all this. I know I do.
I need hugs. Tons and tons of hugs.
And I also need to know everything about being a mom. What do you do when they come home? How often do you feed them? They grow up quick and I'm okay with that - I just need to know how fast and what do I need to do and what do I need to buy before I go to Brazil and.... well, everything else about motherhood I suppose. Take it one day at a time is fine enough advice, but if I'm going to be outside of my comfort zone and time zone, I'd like at least to have some idea of ONE thing I can take care of and have a small amount of control over.
This entry is just one long vent. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed today - and I miss Jared, but I'm trying to not miss him. He'll be back soon, right? It's not like he's dead - I didn't even go inside the airport with him becuase I wanted to pretend like it was all routine and he'd be back soon. Hey, a month isn't THAT bad. I have things planned - a tour with the band, a haircut, a few baby showers and my cousin is going to come see me. I really, really need to try and keep things in perspective.
But dang it, I love him and I've gotten really used to getting hugs and kisses when I need them, and snuggles when I need them. And a best friend that spends the night every night? I really have gotten slightly used to this marriage thing.
Okay, before I get too broken up and lose my grip, I'm going to take advantage of mom being here and go snuggle with her. She was my original snuggle buddy and in an emergency as this is, she's still good:)
SUPERCRACK needs her mommy.