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song memories

July 28, 2005 at 8:34 a.m.

So 2 songs are going through my head lately - thanks to my gratuious use of VH1 as my background music for the day. Both songs I don't think I dug at first - but they have caught my ear - possibly because I've heard them so much (pop can get like that - some songs get my toe tapping because I recognize them a little - and then I realize it's N'Sync and I should go gouge my ears out)

So the first is These Words by Natasha Bedingfield.

I need someone to listen to it - really listen to it - and tel me if I like it because I've heard it so many times or if it's good. I just find something uplifting about the use of the rhythmic synthesizers and harmonies rather than a typical guitar-bass-drum track sound.

That and I understand the words - having been a songwriter at some time myself. Just about a year ago I played my first reall honest paying gig at the Paper Heart in Phoenix and had a blast. My loving dadoo put the audio and video up on his site. But since then, I have been so busy with the job and the getting married, that it hasn't occured to me to sing and write. In fact, I haven't picked up my guitar much in the last year - for a few reasons. I keep breaking strings and no sooner do I replace 'em, but I break another one. And I'm happy. I uually write for therapy, and I haven't need any. Heck, these excuses aren't all that valid, seeing as I married a guy with more guitars than me. I think I have more amplifiers than him though - electric violinists are notoriously picky;)

So, the song reminds me of writing. Maybe I'll get back on the bandwagon... I guess I'll never be that rock star I was hoping for, but I can still play and sing for my friends... if they lived within a few states of me anyway:( And the chorus of the song is a woman in love - at least me - when I feel in love (as I do - constantly) I want to just scream it from the hilltops. man, you'd be surprised (or maybe you wouldn't...)
if you saw what a geek I'm like when I'm alone and then it his me - I'm LOVED!! By the coolest guy in the whole world!!!

There might be dancing.. I'm not quite sure about that though...;)

The other is the new Gwen Stefani single, Cool. Now, honestly, her latest album is a travesty and every time I hear most of her music I want to vomit (Hollaback Girl?!?! NOOOOoooooo!!!!), but this latest song is actually quite nice. I like the 80's throwback sound, and the lyrics are about her breakup from the bassist from No Doubt.

I'm sure everyone knows the story, but the overview is that she and Tony dated for years while they were starting their band, adn then he broke up with her and she turned her heartbreak into their Tragic Kingdom album - most of the songs are abot how he hurt her, and amazingly, the band remained intact and wildly sucessful (ah how I miss their old ska sound....)

The lyrics remind touch on their relationship now - how amazing it is that they are "cool" now with each other - he calls her by her new last name they hang out with his new girlfriend... the video hearks on their individual happiness but also a touch of the past and how the 2 were happy together once.

It reminded me of, well, the only ex-boyfriend that I still talk to, Loren. (that link is to an entry we both wrote almost 3 years ago about the night we met).

Things went sour, like they were supposed to - I needed to move on with my life and marry Jared, and he needed to grow up and experience some life after living in static for years. But at the time we were together, he was such a good friend - and quite the adoring boyfriend. He gave me one of the best Christmas/New Year's presents I've ever had (after my family forgot to get me anything) - flying to meet me in Colorado for New Years and my first kiss at midnight, and he even brought me a small tree so he could put his presents around them so we could celebrate the holiday on our own. And printed out every diary entry I had from then so I could have a paper copy of this. Very thoughtful boy, he was.

I remember when we broke up - I was so devistated and thought I'd never get married because my greatest love had fallen through. Ug, from then I dated "good" LDS boys who turned out to be very, very bad for me. Bryan and Erik, but then I lucked out and got the best one of all. And through it all, I've had Loren to call, comiserate with and laugh with.

I like how things turn out. I know we're friends. It's interesting to look back... and know it's all okay. It didn't seem like it would for a little while, but in the end - for some reason - I'm blessed.

So I've just been thinking today. And packing -

We CLOSE tomorrow! We're gonna be HOME OWNERS!!!

And Jared just called me with news of cheap tickets to Rio de Janero - that sounds like so much fun!!! Just being in Brazil, hearing him speak nothing but Portuguese... man, I won't be able to keep my hands to myself!!!

SUPERCRACK is hiding under boxes and boxes and boxes....


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