BIRTHDAY THREAT
2000-10-10 at 12:45PM-ish
Okay world...
You told me to practice my violin. If I don't, I'm a terrible person. Check. You told me to shoot for the stars and get out there - be a winner so I can eventually stand high atop a mound of broken wanna-be's and point my fingr at the masses below me that made fun of my weird clothes and my weirder family in grade school. Double Check.
And now, you tell me that I have to get older. Che- w h a t?? AND you tell me that birthdays must stink because we don't want to get older and big dinosaur cakes and plastic skates and swords are for 4 year olds.
If I have to turn 21 next week, so be it - but I want balloons, and I want clowns, and a ticker-tape parade heralding the moment when my nasty naked body started screaming, never to stop.
And if my parents don't send me flowers I'll glue my ears to my head. If no one remembers, I'll change my catchy answering machine message. I'll stop calling people "sexy" and I'll shave my eyebrows and wear sack cloth and ashes. I refuse to have another stinky birthday as long as I live!!!!!
See? I DON'T have to grow up. Nyah nyeah.
SUPERCRACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!